Spring Break

Can I get a break too?

Kudos to all who are enjoying Spring Break, while others are busy working to pay bills to survive. Last two weeks brought enough headaches for most.

Running a business is crazy sometimes. There are still days where I want to bang my head against the door out of frustration. It doesn’t work. It makes your head hurt.

Anything to relieve some stress. After my classes two weeks ago, I got some great insights on the completion of a long-anticipated project. Now I abandoned the book momentarily. Last week, I almost lost my eleven-year-old Chihuahua at the vet.

She was going under for a simple, comprehensive exam and possibly could’ve been given too much…..and her heart stopped beating. She briefly flatlined after the injection and had to be revived with CPR.

She came to, however, finding this out at work was painful. Getting the call from the vet saying they couldn’t do her comprehensive exam because she died briefly on the table rattled me.

I remember my mother leaving me a voicemail saying she didn’t make it, she stopped breathing. My own heart stopped beating at that moment. I thought to myself what happened and why?

This has never happened before. And yes, she’s overweight. I know she has allergies and a collapsed trachea, but I felt that along with a possible overdose caused her to see God for a minute.

It made me think. We all die. It’s inevitable, and life is short. I became extremely depressed and angry in the past two weeks. Your best friends are your life and your blood and to lose them hurts.

It saddens me that they’re eleven and thirteen and are senior dogs. I don’t want to let go, but I know I need to eventually, but not now.

Some customers at work made it worse with their sassiness and makes the mental health go down even further into the toilet. Then I got the flu again for the third time and from work again.

On Monday of this week, I went with to vet with my dog and talked with the vet about what happened and what future options are possible. She merely explained that after the injection, oxygen levels decreased dramatically than what they wanted and stopped the procedure right then and there. With a simple, comprehensive exam, my dog gets dental work and cleaning, shots and other preliminary exams since she’s a senior dog. We did the entire comprehensive exam without anesthesia, and her dental work was only a needing of teeth cleaning. No serious dental work needed. So I have to resort to either dental bones, wipes or risk the battle of getting bit by an angry Chihuahua that will argue with you like a child for cleaning their teeth.

The real question beckons: what do I do when she needs real surgery? How do we put her under safely to repair an injury or a health problem? I sat there at the vet and maintained my composure and kept a dry face. It was hard. I wanted to cry. Your animals are the best and are considered your children.

While the doctor was administering the exam, my oldest one hates going to the vet and was in quite a panic. She had one of her worst anxiety and panic attacks. She was panting and pacing around. My youngest sat there on the examining table cool as a cucumber and with no muzzle on, which is super shocking. She’s a convicted biter and has bitten people before at the vet. But today she was very relaxed and didn’t mind getting shots, her teeth cleaned, ears cleaned, and anal glands squeezed. Gross, but I care about my girls and want them to live for a while longer.

After that, she was sore from the shots. She’s doing a lot better. But she is forever banned for scaring me for a while. I don’t want anything more traumatic to happen anytime soon. I’ve been through enough drama in the past few years that I can handle.

I wish for a vacation although it’s totally out of the picture. My budget also went to hell because of real life expenses that come with the responsibility of being an adult. It sucks sometimes.

I have to hustle and work my butt off the old fashioned way for a break. Can’t go anywhere without money and can’t have any without making any.

So while others are bragging about their glorious spring break, I say it must be nice.


One comment

  1. Best wishes …Whatever we pass through is to expand our consciousness, make us better , wiser and stronger .
    Just true to find the kingdom of heaven within you . You are an extension of God and real joy and peace is within you in your alignment with your higher self or supreme self through unconditioned joy and unconditional love.

    Focus on the good that you already have and things that are better and that you are grateful for would come .
    Best wishes and love and light from Lebanon…


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