If you haven’t already figured it out by following the blog, I am a single middle aged woman. I will say this: Just because I’m single doesn’t mean I’m weird or too lazy to find someone. Right now in my life, I work long hours, I take care of my two dogs and also help take care of my parents so I don’t have the time for a relationship. I have people that I can count on aside from my parents and I have a small group of friends, but I do enjoy the single life.
You would think that since I’m closing in on age 35 (in a few months), that I would be married and have a family by now; but I’m not. (Remember the song “Hold the Line” by Toto? One of the lyrics is “Love isn’t always on time!”) In some ways, I was glad that I didn’t have kids or get married too young. I was young, stupid, and very immature in my early 20’s and couldn’t decide on what to with the rest of my life.
When I was in junior high, one of my best friends got pregnant and had two kids before we even made it to high school. Then in high school, I knew a lot of girls that got pregnant and their kids are probably college aged by now. I knew some kids that got married very young and had kids before and right after graduation.
Call me crazy, but I don’t want to enter a commitment like marriage or parenthood unless it’s with someone who I really love. I’m not really looking for someone at this point in my life, but if that person should walk into my life than, great. As far as parenting goes, I don’t really see myself as a natural-born mother. I’ve always been more of a tomboy and I wasn’t one of those girls that dreamed about their wedding day and had names already picked out for their future children.
But being single doesn’t necessarily mean that I’m lonely or a loser. I just prefer to be single.
Being single does have its advantages:
- A lot less stress since you’re not in a relationshp with anyone (I mean a lot less stress!)
- You have more freedom because you have no responsibilities such as children
- You pretty much can do what you want to do
- You have more time to focus on your career
- You have more time waiting for the right person to come along
- You have more control over your money
Just know that marriage and parenthood aren’t for everyone and if it’s not meant to be for me, then I will not cry over it. As long as I’m surrounded by people who truly care for me then I’m good.
Relationships can be stressful and sometimes very complicated. I have certain ground rules when it comes to relationships: Treat me with the out most respect and I’ll return the favor. Communication and honesty are very important, trust is also very important to me, too. My rules aren’t that hard to understand because I have zero tolerance for yelling and screaming. I will not put up with that and another thing is that I won’t put up with is abuse. My maternal grandparents were always fighting and I don’t know why they stayed together for so many years. Because of that experience, I don’t feel the need to get married or enter into a relationship with the wrong person.